Tips for Falling Asleep and Staying Asleep

Hello,
If you are new here, welcome! I’m a Licensed Professional Counselor in New Jersey and Pennsylvania specializing in an insomnia treatment called CBT-I. I love helping exhausted adults break the cycle of sleepless nights. 

Introduction

When it comes to falling asleep and staying asleep, there is no one cause, and therefore, no one size fits all solution. Various factors can contribute to this difficulty including: revenge bedtime procrastination, circadian rhythm issues, insomnia, nightmares and so on. 

I have outlined some tips below but if you’re having significant difficulty, feel free to schedule a free consultation. You can also talk with your primary care physician for more support. You don’t have to stay stuck alone!

Active vs Resting Brain

In many aspects of life, working hard and taking steps to get something done is an effective approach; but when it comes to sleep, being active, and trying to fall asleep, promotes an active mind, making it hard for the mind to fall asleep. 

This is particularly true if there is a sense of urgency. For instance, a common thought is “If I fall asleep right now, I have exactly _ hours left to sleep”. This sense of urgency repels sleep.

Falling asleep is a letting go, a release of control, and a shift in consciousness. Attempting to control it makes it less likely to happen.

At the same time, falling asleep is not as simple as “just relaxing” at bedtime. Many of the best strategies for sleep happen outside the bed, and away from bedtime. 

For example, if lying in bed at night is the first time all day you've had to think, your brain will likely take that opportunity to work through any backlog of tasks. You might start remembering things like “oh! I need to grab tomatoes when I’m at the store” or “I need to send that calendar invite.”

Our brains are amazing problem solving machines. 

Giving yourself some time to think outside of the bed and away from bedtime allows your mind to process things before it is time for sleep. 

It is especially helpful to do this outside of the bed, because then you can take action on what you need to remember. For example, you can write “tomatoes” on the grocery list, send that calendar invite you just remembered, and write things down to offload them from your brain. This is just one of many things that can help with sleep.

Associations 

If you’ve ever been relaxing and heard a ringtone or alert “ping” that you’ve associated with a stressful job, you may have noticed feeling stressed immediately, perhaps with muscle tension and sweating. As humans, we can be conditioned to have a physical response to things in our environment. That notification associated with work triggers a physical stress response.

The same can be true for the bed. Sometimes stress can become associated with the bed and make it hard to fall or stay asleep. If you’re feeling exhausted during the day but then when you go to bed you start feeling wired and alert with stress, it may be an association between the bedroom and stress. 
Here are some clues that this may be happening for you:
1. You sleep better in a hotel room (because there isn’t the same association with stress)

2. If you close your eyes and picture or think about your bed, you feel a little stressed just bringing that image to mind.

One great place to start is separating the bedroom from any daytime activities. For example, if you work from home, separate the bedroom from the workspace when possible. Reading or watching TV is common in bed, but doing this can build an unhelpful association between being awake and being in bed, especially if you love thrillers or exciting books or shows. You can still enjoy all the same activities but separating them from the bed promotes a new association between the bed and sleep.

Breaking this association can be tricky, but there are therapists and healthcare providers who can help you. 

Where to get more support
If you’ve tried to make changes and you’re still having trouble falling or staying asleep, you may want to seek additional support from a healthcare provider to explore what other factors may be contributing to the issue.

After the free consultation, I offer a full sleep-focused assessment using the structured clinical interview for sleep disorders. Together we can identify your specific needs and come up with a treatment plan to get you back on track to quality sleep.

You can learn more about me and the work I do on the “about” page

Wishing you well,

Kasryn Kapp, LPC

Schedule@bodymindalliancecc.com

215-259-8016